marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
