Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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