We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
