CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
