My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
