If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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