So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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