At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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