Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
