Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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