I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
