And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
