okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
