there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
do nipples grow back?
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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