Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
