don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
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