but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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