is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
