before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize