I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
