i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Congratulations! We have a period
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
