i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
My liver just had a heart attack.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Randomize