don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
