Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
try to milk me bitch
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