Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
