I got chris browned last night
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
