i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
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