What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize