Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
