remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
