Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I'm too high and old for this...
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
