That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
