dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
