she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize