I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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