so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
