for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
