Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize