Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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