So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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