It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
