Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
