Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
