Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Randomize