DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Randomize
