Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize
