He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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