Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
