pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
my poor anus
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
