I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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