Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
try to milk me bitch
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