I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Randomize
