"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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